Brenternet (The World as seen by Brent Moore)

Trying to appeal to the highest common denominator. I can't give you 110% effort, but I will give you 107.4% effort. If you're a spammer and leave me a comment, I will make fun of you. I use twice as many semicolons compared to most other bloggers

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Location: Smyrna, Tennessee, United States

As the title implies, I am Brent K. Moore. I married MariLynn Simons on Sept. 25, 1999. we attend Stewart's Creek Church of Christ. We have five pets, a dachshund, Slinkie, a malamute, Juno, and three rabbits, Ebunny and Ifurry, and now Houdini.

Friday, February 29, 2008

Upcoming Will Ferrell Movies

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Will Ferrell Portrays a mixed doubles tennis player who is a hotheaded womanizer who has trouble with authority in the upcoming movie "Forty - Love."

Will Ferrell Portrays a football quarterback who is a hotheaded womanizer who has trouble with authority in the upcoming movie "Sacked in his Pocket."

Will Ferrell Portrays a slugging major league first baseman who is a hotheaded womanizer who has trouble with authority in the upcoming movie "Goin' Deep."

Will Ferrell Portrays a Soccer striker who is a hotheaded womanizer who has trouble with authority in the upcoming movie "Header."

Will Ferrell Portrays a Professional Golfer who is a hotheaded womanizer who has trouble with authority in the upcoming movie "Fore! Master."

Will Ferrell Portrays an Olympic swimmer who is a hotheaded womanizer who has trouble with authority in the upcoming movie "Freestyler."

Will Ferrell Portrays a Republican Senator who is a hotheaded womanizer who has trouble with authority in the upcoming movie "Streaker of the House."

Will Ferrell Portrays a Rugby Forward who is a hotheaded womanizer who has trouble with authority in the upcoming movie "Scrum Hooker."

Will Ferrell Portrays a Number 1 Polo Player who is a hotheaded womanizer who has trouble with authority in the upcoming movie "Up Chukka"

Will Ferrell Portrays a Cricket batsman who is a hotheaded womanizer who has trouble with authority in the upcoming movie "Knockin' Wickets."

Here are some upcoming sports movies that don't have Will Ferrell in it. (They also won't employ my mastery of photoshop either.) Coming soon to a theater near New Jersey.

A young man is a clothing store owner. One night after a suit is stolen from his store, he chases down the thief with amazing swiftness. From there, his friends and family convince him to pursue his dream of becoming an Olympic sprinter. See the feel-good movie of the year "Haberdasher."

A major league baseball slugger has it all, until he gets involved with the wrong crowd. He becomes blackmailed by a gambling bookie and is forced to collect unpaid debts by threatening violence upon the deadbeats. See the feel-bad movie of the year "Designated Hitter."

An Irish basketball team has never been competitive in International play. A new coach emphasizes a new strategy utilizing the teams only advantage, their speed, to overcome the odds and challenge to become the top European team. See the feel-okie-dokie movie of the year "BelFast Break."


My Newest Fan!

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So I was minding my own business checking my MySpace email inbox when I got this lovely message from a guy with the screen name "The MOthMan Catcher." Here is his email, cut and pasted here completely unchanged, except I've edited all of the naughty words.

Yeah hey ... nice taxidermy makeover ! If your town supports that [naughty word deleted] ... you're lucky I don't publicly / nationally make fun of you for your post that you've got here , and YOU'RE lucky if I don't expose the small town trash / people that uses that [naughty word deleted] to do bad stuff or to get money or whatever ! ( BELIEVE ME ! ) YOu piece of [naughty word deleted] ! Check out the mothman and the other trash , and see you're kinda outta date and made a fool of ! IDIOT ! I HATE TRASH LIKE YOU ! TWO THUMBS DOWN FOR POOR QUALITY AND POOR STORY LINES !!! BOO ! YOU [NAUGHTY WORD DELETED] SAD [NAUGHTY WORD DELETED] POSER !!!!

This made my day! Although I would love the opportunity to be publicly / nationally made fun of, because just imagine how many hits my blog would then get, allowing me to rack up the advertising dollars!

I'm not too certain which post of mine he was particularly upset about, although there's a good chance it was either this picture:
Which I think is a carved-from-a-tree mothman, or probably a mothwoman, and he is THE mothman catcher. However, I don't think I've ever posted about it, but if you google "Mothman" or "Cryptozoology" you are likely to find that picture and it gets viewed 10-15 times a day. By the way, this mothwoman is a wooden carving at the fine non-chain motel in Chattanooga we were staying at.

Odds are more than likely that he came across this post about this picture
Creature of Sugar Flat Rd. - Lebanon, TN
which was linked to by and resulted in the neighborhood of 20,000 hits to this blog.

I would like to open a dialog with Mr. Catcher, and I pulled up his Myspace Profile. I now realize that his own words will be much more entertaining and thought provoking that any missive I could opine about him. So here we go, all of this is information he wrote on his myspace profile. (As before, all dialog is left intact with only the naughty words removed.)

This page is to expose the ignorence we live around .. Whether it be just in WV , or across the world .... and the purpose of this page is to eliminate the homes for serial killers , and the promotion / mentallity of them .

He's just getting started. The ignorence is bountiful. How much can you stand?

Some people who'd support something like my title . Why do we have to live like our town and our people is from pet cemetery or something ? NO ONE SUPPORT ENDING STATE / SMALL TOWN MAFIA [naughty word deleted] ?

Pursuing the mothman / state pen's place and the other [naughty word deleted] , and taking it down or making it something else . There is no reason for ghost hunters or whoever to roam around in the pen and look for death / ghosts . There is no ghost / aliens there is people ! Check out reality with God . The aliens would disenegrate , and the ghost would be satan in the form of the mummy if allowed by the dopehead seein it ... ( from lights allowances ! )

Favorite Books: Where the red fern grows

If you all wanna disagree with this page ... you're promoting terrorism , and you're also allowing satan to live . Why allow satan to be in your life , and why would you promote serial killers ? ??? TAKE IT THE [naughty word deleted] DOWN ! OR you can say I'm the God of all things ... since the god of heaven and earth told me so , and since I have proof and all . ( at least enough proof to leave a mystery lol )

" take it the [naughty word deleted] down " ( the moth man statue .. which is the most ignorent [naughty word deleted] I've ever seen . ... PEOPLE... why do we have a [naughty word deleted] statue of a serial killer ? ) that should be a local soldier or president bush or something .. NOT A STATUE OF AN UNKNOWN SERIAL KILLER / THE REMAINS HE LEFT BEHIND TO FLEE WITH .

People ... if I die ... since they kill whoever pursues it ( so they can keep [naughty word deleted] the way it is ) KNow its not a [naughty word deleted] curse and see the " mafia " behind it . AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT ! OUR FUTURE DEPENDS ON IT !

THINK ... does someone have a right to kill you or someone you love ... ( or hate even ) and say that it was the " mothman " ? Is it true that our law enforcement is just , a drug doin mafia / sex scandals or master hypnotists ? Obvisoulsy funders of terroism , considering they'd " highly " laugh or snub their nose so to speak at a [naughty word deleted] statue representing terrorism / lies . Is the money / sex / whatever worth it ? I DONT [naughty word deleted] THINK SO YOU DUMB [naughty word deleted] !

[naughty word deleted] with me !
I'll be bustin that [naughty word deleted] in the middle of the night the middle of some karate or whatever ! Try me !
Bring it dopeheads.....Even in Character ! I dare ya .
I'm gonna bust that [naughty word deleted] !

The mothman's last strike according to the media ... was in 2007 on a bridge in minnesota on HWY I 35 . He or she has struck since the 60s' and the [naughty word deleted] pumpkinhead [naughty word deleted] has went far enough dont you think ? [naughty word deleted] ! its seriously just a [naughty word deleted] scapegoat ... for architectural defaults / mafia's murder so to speak . The money making and the murder has got to end . Why promote this [naughty word deleted] People ? Why fund Terroism , and swear you want nothing but the terrorism to stop . YOu're saying 911's planes were driven by ghosts you [naughty word deleted] idiots !

He goes on a lot longer in his blog. He also prints his name and address and phone number in his blog. Should I send Mr. Catcher a Christmas card this year? Or better yet, a leap day card? But what do I know, I'm not a West Virginian College Student. I'm only a small town SAD [NAUGHTY WORD DELETED] POSER.


Merry Leap Day

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Although it's been said many times, many ways, Merry Leap Day to you!

Looking up to Lovers Leap

What better way to celebrate leap day than with a picture of Lovers Leap at Rock City!

On the first day of Leap Day my true love gave to me, a partridge in a pear tree.

Airborne Fritz

This is my mother-in-law's dog leaping in honor of leap day

It's beginning to look a lot like leap day, everywhere you go.

Flying Motorcycle stuntman 2

Here's a crazy motorcycle stuntman leaping in the air to honor leap day.

I'm dreaming of a white leap day
With every leap day card I write
May your days be merry and bright
And may all your Leap days be white

Xtreme K-9's

When the frisbee-catching dog leaps in the air above you in honor of leap day, Determine what is most important to you and needs your protection.

We wish you a Merry Leap Day,
We wish you a Merry Leap Day,
We wish you a Merry Leap Day,
And a Happy Pi Day.

The ball sails above a leaping Jason Botts

The first baseman leaps into the air to catch an errant throw.

Have a holly jolly Leap Day,
and in case you didn't hear,
Oh by golly, have a holly,
jolly Leap Day this year.

When Pigs Fly....or Hurdle

Even pigs can get into the leaping action on leap day

Have yourself a merry little Leap Day.
Let your heart be light,
From now on our troubles
Will be out of sight.

Stunt Bike

Leaping Lizards! look at that stuntbiker go! All in honor of leap day!

All I want for Leap Day is my two front teeth,
My two front teeth, see my two front teeth.
Gee, if I could only have my two front teeth,
Then I could wish you "Merry Leap Day."


Sunday, February 24, 2008

Col. Sanders for Senator!

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This election year, It's my goal to bring you the hard-hitting political talk you shouldn't get anywhere else. Today's topic is when Kentucky Fried Chicken founder Harland "Colonel" Sanders tried to become a politician, running for state senate, as evidenced by this campaign flyer:

Col. Sanders for Senate

He didn't become a State Senator. Of course, he wasn't a Colonel either. I think he didn't even win the Republican primary.

His campaign slogan should have been: A Chicken in every fryer.
A bad slogan would have been: He's Finger Lickin' Good!

Edited on Feb 28, 2008 to add: Jacob on Flickr had a really good comment that I wanted to share here: I Guess that makes him "right wing."

The above image, as well as all of the following ones come from the First Kentucky Fried Chicken Restaurant and Museum in Corbin, KY. Harland Sanders opened his first restaurant, the Sanders Cafe, along the well-traveled Dixie Highway in Corbin. That restaurant has been preserved and operates today as a modern KFC as well as a Museum to Sanders.

KFC signs: Old and New The Original KFC

At this point I should note that I was here at about the poorest time in my life, as I had been unemployed for several months in the summer of 06. (my wife was working at the time and I was drawing unemployment.) Right before I started my new job as a temp employee for an outsourcer in a Hewlett Packard facility, we decided to take a discount vacation. We went to the free Cumberland Falls and this free museum where we could stop for fast food. I should also note that this was a distant #2 on what was most important on our itinerary. We also had to stay at this Economy hotel. But I digress, so let me halfway un-digress back to Sanders Cafe.

Bust of Col. Sanders

Col Sanders is everywhere. Prominent in the lobby is the bust of Col. Sanders.
If you are so inclined, you can sit on a bench with a statue of Col. Sanders in the back. Or, if your so inclined, on the right, you can pick your next tourist destination when the novelty of a KFC museum wears off.

The First Sanders Cafe Kitchen

The original Kitchen, preserved for posterity on display behind a barrier.

Col Sanders Bobblehead

Col Sanders bobblehead, and he's holding a bucket of chicken!

Replica Harlan Sanders Cafe and Motel

At the time of the Cafe, Sanders also owned a motel next door, called Sanders Court. Here is a small model of what the restaurant and Court looked like back then.

A room at Sanders Court

Apparently, there's enough space in the Restaurant to recreate a motel room from the Sanders court. Notice the Old-timey phone on the wall. When I got back from this trip, I had sent this picture to some people saying we had stayed here. Ironically, it was nicer than where we really stayed.

I wonder which other fast food chains have a similar type museum. A few years back, my wife and I were vacationing in Chicago and we came not too far from the first McDonalds museum. Is there a Subway museum that displays Jared's big pants? What about a MinitBurger museum?


Friday, February 15, 2008

This car doesn't run on gasoline, it runs on...

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The Hawaiian Punch Muscle Car

It's the Hawaiian Punch Muscle Car!

As someone who's in to photography, it's amazing that I will drive a couple of hours to photograph something, but don't usually go out of my way to take a picture of things I want pictures of that I drive past every day. On the way to work, I'll pass by something and realize it was there yesterday, there today and will probably be there tomorrow, too, so there's no rush. Today, I suppose it was the right amount of resolve, and the car parked up closer to the street than normal.

Parked in front of a mechanic less than a mile from my house on Lowry St. (US41/70S) in Smyrna, TN. Based on the cars parked in front of this mechanic's shop, I think they probably specialize in muscle cars. It's missing headlights, so it's not night time street legal yet. My favorite thing about the car is the bar code at the front. I wonder if it replicates an actual bar code from an actual Hawaiian punch bottle. I'm too lazy to go to the fridge and look. I should print out this picture and try to scan it the next time I'm at the grocery store.

At this point, I should confess my love for Hawaiian Punch, specifically the flagship flavor of Fruit Juicy Red. That's right, I'm a 31 year old fat married guy with no kids who usually has a gallon of Fruit Juicy Red in my fridge. But alas, I would have never thought of customizing my car like the one above.

Continuing with the tour of the car, to the top and back of the front wheel is written "24 Pack." Fruit Juicy Red is written on the driver side door and Hawaiian Punch is written behind the rear wheel. If they really wanted to put forth an extra effort, they'd replace the rims with really large blue bottle caps. I also wonder if the car is a convertible, or if the roof is just missing.


Monday, February 11, 2008

Valentine's Day Cards for Nerds

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Valentine for nerds 2

Valentine for nerds 4

Valentine for nerds 3

Valentine for nerds 1

Valentine for nerds 5

And now, for a real Valentine:

2008 Valentines card