Brenternet (The World as seen by Brent Moore)

Trying to appeal to the highest common denominator. I can't give you 110% effort, but I will give you 107.4% effort. If you're a spammer and leave me a comment, I will make fun of you. I use twice as many semicolons compared to most other bloggers

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Location: Smyrna, Tennessee, United States

As the title implies, I am Brent K. Moore. I married MariLynn Simons on Sept. 25, 1999. we attend Stewart's Creek Church of Christ. We have five pets, a dachshund, Slinkie, a malamute, Juno, and three rabbits, Ebunny and Ifurry, and now Houdini.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

The Worst Hotel I've Ever Stayed in

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There was a time earlier this year where I was unemployed. However, that didn't stop the wife and I from wanting to go on a 2-day/1-night mini-vacation. After sifting through several state parks that were all within a 5-hour drive, we settled on Cumberland Falls, as that day would fall on the right day to see the famed "Cumberland Falls Moonbow." While we saw the falls, we missed out on the moonbow because it was too cloudy. (Side note: For my Nashville buddies, Cumberland Falls is on the Cumberland River, but it's way upstream where it's actually pretty.)

Cumberland falls

We had a very tight budget, and couldn't afford one of those expensive hotels - you know, like a Days Inn or a Motel 6. Now, I'm the kinda guy that likes to plan everything - not necessarily planning how we spend every minute, but have every driving exit number and turn memorized and have all of the details of the night's stay planned. My wife on the other hand while growing up would go on trips with her family where they would just pick a random mom-and-pop motel along the country highway. These are the ones that are not part of a chain, are clean, only cost $25 and the curtains and neon sign are 50 years old. Something like this:

Scenic Motel sign - Pigeon Forge, TN

So, we were driving the old highways of Kentucky, and it was late. We couldn't afford the Holiday Inn and the Super 8 located at the interstate exit. On into town, we found this:

Vacancy

The selling points of this motel are the direct dial phones and the color TVs! I suppose for $35, I can't ask for too much. Let's look at the highlights:

(You can click on any picture in this blog to enlarge.)

There's a hole in my towel

This towel has a substantial hole in it. There's also a small brown stain at the bottom. Also, I like the drinking cups. There are 21 Shoney's Inns nationwide and this isn't one of them. (And, there isn't one anywhere else in Kentucky, either.)

Study on different shades of color

There are many strange colors to be found here. The first thing I notice is the pink tile around the soapdish, which you don't see anywhere else. The door frame needs paint, The inside and outside of the tub could use a good cleaning. There's a dead bug on the floor (and a few spiders were camera shy and hid behind the toilet). Personally, I like the changing color of the yellowing vinyl floor. It's tough to see but there's a bucket to catch the water dripping from the intake pipe to the toilet.

furniture

There isn't too much to see here, but I like the warped cushion. The wall could use paint, and there is missing wood on the right.

Air freshener

Now, this is the icing on the cake. You have got to love the car air freshener taking on the entire room. (Strawberry!) The curtain rod hasn't fallen off yet, but it's holding the spider web in place (or vice-versa). I would describe that curtain color as "Sun-dried Mustard" but at least it matches the bathroom floor.

All-in-all, it wasn't a complete dump. There weren't any roaches that were so big that you could see their facial expressions. I had a night's sleep and that's what I paid for. My wife insists that they are usually not this bad, and we have tried it again with better results. I suppose this place was still better that the kind of motel that you rent in increments smaller than an evening.

4 Comments:

Blogger Carla said...

I got here through a flickr photo on the motel group, and love your story here! I've stayed at a bunch of these hotels with similar "facilities", enjoyed your blog!

9:16 PM  
Blogger Jon Coupal said...

Herman Cain used this picture in one of his Facebook posts today. I live in London, right near Corbin. The Economy Inn on Main Street in London makes the one in your essay look like the Ritz-Carlton.

9:43 AM  
Blogger BrentKMoore said...

Thanks for the tip! Here's a link to where my photo is used on CainTV.com:
HERE.

6:33 PM  
Blogger The Dougster said...

Believe it or not, the worst motel I ever stayed in was in Smyrna, TN way back in 1981! The state of Tennessee assigned it a "B" rating......that should've told me something right then and there! Funny story, Brent!

11:58 PM  

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