Brent K. Moore for President
Today, I'd like to announce my candidacy for President of the United States
I'd also like to add that I'm not 35 yet, but will be in 2012. So, I'm actually running for President in 2012, but I'm starting my campaign now to get a head start now against whoever becomes the incumbent.
I'd like to outline my platform:
• Experience: I was president of my high school math club. That makes me a true Washington Outsider.
• Supports Universal Nerf Care.
• Supports drilling for ice in ANWR.
• Proposes the creation of IRS tax form 1099-G, which reduces estate taxes for individuals becoming ghosts.
• Wants to build a terrestrial fence to keep out space aliens.
• For Clean Air, Clean Water, Clean Energy, Clean trees, Clean fish, Clean rice, Clean and jerk weightlifting, Mr. Clean, and Clean rap lyrics.
• Wants to stop America's dependence on foreign chocolate.
• Supports criminalization of using potted meat.
• Only candidate willing to take a stand against cicadas.
• Wants to stop large corporations from making excessive profits on coffee.
• I don't like the song "Low Rider" by the group War. This makes me the true anti-War candidate.
• Guys named Lester and ladies named Leslie should pay taxes just like the rest of us. Thus, I'm in favor of Les Taxes.
• Wants to fix Social Security by letting you know right now that you're not going to be getting anything.
• Wants to establish a timeline to withdraw all troops out of Milwaukee.
• I'm the official third party candidate of the 2008 Olympics.
• Will cut the size of Pork Barrel spending, making it Pork bucket spending.
• My economic plan supports free trade with all forward-thinking nations that will allow us to download a bunch of MP3's for free.
• Does not think one man should have over thirty-seven wives.
• Will only nominate judges that like Led Zeppelin because they totally rock!
• Wants to land a man on the moon by the end of the 60's.
• is smart enough to not name my grassroots effort "My B.O."
• Supports Torte reform.
• Wants to repeal the provision of the Patriot Act which allowed New England to spy on their NFL opponents.
• Will reduce the influence of Special Interest by giving more attention to unspecial interests.
• Will fight unceasingly and unwaveringly to protect and ensure every American's Ninth Amendment rights!
• Supports civil rights for red-headed stepchildren.
31378
I'd also like to add that I'm not 35 yet, but will be in 2012. So, I'm actually running for President in 2012, but I'm starting my campaign now to get a head start now against whoever becomes the incumbent.
I'd like to outline my platform:
• Experience: I was president of my high school math club. That makes me a true Washington Outsider.
• Supports Universal Nerf Care.
• Supports drilling for ice in ANWR.
• Proposes the creation of IRS tax form 1099-G, which reduces estate taxes for individuals becoming ghosts.
• Wants to build a terrestrial fence to keep out space aliens.
• For Clean Air, Clean Water, Clean Energy, Clean trees, Clean fish, Clean rice, Clean and jerk weightlifting, Mr. Clean, and Clean rap lyrics.
• Wants to stop America's dependence on foreign chocolate.
• Supports criminalization of using potted meat.
• Only candidate willing to take a stand against cicadas.
• Wants to stop large corporations from making excessive profits on coffee.
• I don't like the song "Low Rider" by the group War. This makes me the true anti-War candidate.
• Guys named Lester and ladies named Leslie should pay taxes just like the rest of us. Thus, I'm in favor of Les Taxes.
• Wants to fix Social Security by letting you know right now that you're not going to be getting anything.
• Wants to establish a timeline to withdraw all troops out of Milwaukee.
• I'm the official third party candidate of the 2008 Olympics.
• Will cut the size of Pork Barrel spending, making it Pork bucket spending.
• My economic plan supports free trade with all forward-thinking nations that will allow us to download a bunch of MP3's for free.
• Does not think one man should have over thirty-seven wives.
• Will only nominate judges that like Led Zeppelin because they totally rock!
• Wants to land a man on the moon by the end of the 60's.
• is smart enough to not name my grassroots effort "My B.O."
• Supports Torte reform.
• Wants to repeal the provision of the Patriot Act which allowed New England to spy on their NFL opponents.
• Will reduce the influence of Special Interest by giving more attention to unspecial interests.
• Will fight unceasingly and unwaveringly to protect and ensure every American's Ninth Amendment rights!
• Supports civil rights for red-headed stepchildren.
31378
posted by BrentKMoore | 5:02 AM
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