News Brief: Tv Remotes

NEWS BRIEF: The city council of Carter, Ca has passed a new ordinance banning the use of television remote controls. Mayor Kenneth C. Luther said, "Studies show that the use of TV remotes has contributed to society's negative trend towards obesity and laziness. Also, some studies show that prolonged exposure to the radiation from the remote's signal beam causes cancer in mice and is bad for the environment. The council and I have passed this measure for the benefit of our children." In recent months, the city council has also banned beanbag chairs, school dodgeball, cow milking, bagpipes and Ottomans.


This news brief was brought to you by the Battery Manufacturers Association of America, which reminds you: For maximum protection, the BMAA recommends you change the batteries in your smoke alarm every Sunday.