Build a better Get-out-of-Jury-Duty excuse

From a story just down the road in Memphis, this should get you out of jury duty every time:

"In my neighborhood, everyone knows if you get Mr. Ballin as your lawyer, you're probably guilty."

This happened during jury selection after three people had already been removed from the jury pool. One man got up and left, letting the judge know:

"I'm on morphine and I'm higher than a kite."

another removed juror had almost shot his nephew and another was arrested for prostitution.

EDIT: as of March 03, 2005, I have been selected for jury duty! Shall I try to get out of it using the steps above? Probably not. I have always fantasized about getting on a really big name trial, like the OJ trial, or something like that. Then, after the trial is over, as a halfway competant juror, I could write one of those quick fad books telling my experiences. You heard it here first.